Monday, March 25, 2013

Highway to Hell

This weeks, or rather last week's topic is to discuss the things you did as a kid that you might not have told your parents about... you know the stuff they might not have been so happy to know you did.

Well, my story starts on a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair.  I had a new to me car and a friend in the co-pilot's seat.  My friend and I both liked to drive fast.  My new car was sporty, it was a Honda Accord, LXi hatchback.  It was a fuel injected speedster.  I liked that car.

We wanted to see how fast said vehicle could go.  There was a stretch of 134 near our college that was generally untraveled late at night.  We had not been drinking, we had this total lapse of judgement with all our facilities in tact.  You can imagine where this is going. 

There was no one else on the road.  I looked at my friend, she looked and me and said "hit it."  So it did.  We were up around 120 miles per hour (we pegged the speed o meter) when the lights appeared in my rear view mirror.  As you can imagine, getting a ticket for this type of speed is not going to end well.

My friend immediately suggests offers of sexual favors to get out of the ticket.  I look at her and tell her to shut up.  She is offering cash as an option.  What are we going to do?

The officer knocks on my window and asks me if I know why he pulled me over.  In a flash of genius, I look up at him, stick my chest out, open my eyes real wide and say, "because I was going too slow?"  The sincerity with which I delivered this line, silenced my friend and caused the officer to crack just the slightest smile. 

"Too slow," he says back to me, "how do you figure?"

"Well, sir, I saw the sign back there and it said 134.  I can't imagine we were going that fast, but we were trying."  I said back to him with the most sincere polite voice I could muster.

At which point, the officer, cracks up and says to me that I have given him the best excuse he has heard in a very, very, very long time.  He then went on to tell me about the dangers of speeding.  He said that he did not think we were drunk, just really stupid.  He told me if my license came back clean he would let me off with a warning. 

It came back clean and I left with a warning.  My parents never knew.  I didn't have to get bailed out of jail, and while I have always wondered how fast my mini van can go I have never tried to find out.

Want to see what the other ladies did in their past?  Check them out at:  Froggie, Momarock, and Merrylandgirl


  1. LOVE! I bet Ricardo can go quite fast if you just let him run free!

  2. LOL!!!! I'll need to keep that excuse in my pocket, should I ever get pulled over for speeding! Great post!

  3. That is hilarious!!! Thanks for sharing and for choosing a fun topic. :)